Guest Post: Drew McLellan on Initiating Conversation

Not too long after I began blogging, I received an email from the author of a blog I regularly (and still do) read -- Drew's Marketing Minute.  It seems I had posted the 1,000th comment at Drew's blog, and he asked if I would, to commemorate the milestone, write a guest post.  I was honored and flattered and, of course, I said yes.

1,000 comments!  At that point, I was lucky if I had much more than 100 comments here.

So how ironic and funny that I recently received my 1,000th comment and who was it from?  You guessed it -- Drew McLellan.  (My good friend and blogging instigator CK was # 999.)

What better way to celebrate the milestone than with this guest post by Drew.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

At this post in celebration of David's 1,000th comment and his ability to not only welcome but nurture comments and conversations, it seems fitting to talk about how we initiate conversations with the audiences we're trying to attract.

I have to admit, I don't really understand why businesses are so bad at this.  But most of them truly don't get it.  And yet, we live the model every day.

You wouldn't walk into a party, stick your hand out and say, "I'd like to tell you why I am going to be much more interesting to talk to than anyone else here."  Would you?

Think about when you meet someone new.  How does that initial conversation usually begin?  If you're like most people, you start off by asking a few questions to get your footing.  Is this someone you have something in common with?  What connections might you share?

Once you've demonstrated your interest in this new person, odds are they'll do the same.  Ask a few questions.  Learn more about you.  And so it goes, back and forth until one of two things happen:

• The foundation for a relationship is built
• One or both of you decide there isn't a good fit and you move on.

Either way you win.  You've either made a new connection or you've avoided a bad one before you invested too much into the relationship.

The same truths hold for business communications.  When we do it right, we filter out the potential clients who are a bad fit. Which saves us time and money.  But to do that, we need to model our initial foray around communicating, not talking at them.

Look at your marketing materials.  It might be your website, a PDF you e-mail, or an old-fashioned brochure.  Does it connect with your audience right away by focusing on them?  Do you ask questions to get to know them better?  Or do you demonstrate that you have something in common?

Or like most businesses, is it all about you?  Your products. Your awards? Your prices.  Your guarantee.

Which conversation would you find more appealing?

-- Drew McLellan

Comments

[Scott Townsend]

Drew:

The 1000th comment? Amazing.

OK...let me try. Here's a question. Isn't a person more in control of a conversation when they are asking the questions?

[David Reich]

Hi Scott --

I suppose you have a bit of control when you're asking questions, but I think it's more than a matter of who's in control. Asking some questions, as Drew says, should be a way of showing interest and doing some subtle screening. But listening to the answers is crucial, I think, since conversation is not a one-way street.

Drew may have some other thoughts.

[Drew McLellan]

Scott,

I think that depends on intent. If I have a series of questions that I believe is going to drive you to wanting to hire me, and regardless of how you answer question #1 I am driving to question #2, then yes...I am controlling rather than contributing to the conversation.

But if I ask illuminating questions and actually listen to your answers, which then shifts the conversation accordingly, then I think the conversation itself is in control.

That's fine for a face to face encounter. But let's talk about a printed piece like a brochure. There, you are asking some questions or demonstrating your understanding of where the person is to create a connection and common space.

In that case, it's not about control. It's about common ground.

Did that answer your question about questions? :)

Drew

[Paul Acosta]

Wow, I feel like a fish lost in the sea... 1,000th? And this is my first one? Where have I been? Anyway, I just found your blog and subscribed to it so hopefully it won't be my last. I have to catch up!

In terms of the topic we're dealing with here, I consider everything in life to be part of a trade so in this case it's all about information. You give details about you (or your product) expecting something in return (comprehension for example if it's about you or sales if it's about a product).

During a conversation I don't think any side in particular is in control: the actual element (communication) is the one in control and all we do is just trade back and forth, just like Drew indicated on his comment.

There you go, my first comment in this vast sea (let it be 1,000 more!) because I found what seems to be a great place to share ideas. Thanks!

[David Reich]

Finding common ground... that's a good description, Drew.

Paul, glad to have you aboard. I don't particularly think a conversation has to be about control. It's sharing information and ideas back & forth. There could be some element of control involved if one party's objective of the conversation is to change a way of thinking. But I doubt if you'll achieve that objective just by one-way talking.

[Ricardo Bueno]

I've always felt like at the end of the day, you do business with people you like & trust... You can pitch the product and price but that doesn't inspire confidence at all. What if I don't know your brand?

I think that the best client relationships start with a good conversation.

[Drew McLellan]

Paul,

You are so right -- you've found a great place to hang out, learn and participate! David's one of the best.

Drew

[Drew McLellan]

Ricardo,

Trust is the key, without a doubt. And often times, that trust is earned by demonstrating a genuine interest in the other person without chomping at the bit to get your next product benefit woven into the conversation.

"It all starts with a good conversation."

Exactly!

Drew

[David Reich]

Thanks for the nice words, Drew. Awww shucks.